I want to express how important it is for an autistic person to feel safe around others. A lot of autistic people can cling to one person because they feel that they understand them more than anything. When people talk about how autistic people have "obsessions", it doesn't just mean to objects or interests. It can also be to a person. If that person gets taken away from the autistic person they can feel like no one cares or go through severe depression because they lost the only person they feel cared for them.
It can be difficult for someone with autism to explain how they feel. I can cling to people often and when they are taken away from me I struggle a lot. It can completely change my mood. I go into severe depression and want to constantly talk to them because I miss them. It does not have to be a romantic partner. It can be anyone. I have had friends move away and it hurt me emotionally for a while until I got used to the change. I have a hard time expressing how I feel when someone goes away. I can't always explain how I feel, so it can make me cry or scream instead of verbally being able to tell them I am upset. A lot of the time when these meltdowns happen in autistic people it can mean more than the outsider thinks it does.
I was recently in a situation where I was separated from someone I spent a lot of time with. It completely threw off my routine, along with theirs. We were both having meltdowns during the separation. That person was screaming how much they miss me and I was crying constantly because I was so overwhelmed by the situation. This person is also autistic and did not fully understand why this was happening. I tried to explain it the best I could, but even I couldn't fully understand why. We were each other's support and no one from outside of us was willing to see it or how much it was destroying both our mental health.
I want the outsiders that are watching us to understand that separating two people is not the answer to any situation. It will only hurt both people more. If it seems like the relationship is unhealthy, then talk to them. Do not just separate them with no valid reason. It is okay for them to depend on each other when they are in need. If they are happy and not hurting anyone, then let them be. They may be the reason for each other's happiness and you don't want to ruin it. Especially in cases where both people are autistic. Let these people make their own decisions for themselves. Do not make it for them. It is important that they have someone who cares about them.
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